We are NOT getting a Dog

Despite me being the oldest and supposedly most responsible child, I have this very inconvenient personality clash. The clash is between my impulsiveness and then the anxiety that usually locks me into a plan so as to find security. This impulsiveness sends me out on quests that I somehow planned out within the span of two minutes and think that somehow there is nothing that could possibly go wrong. Consequently, things do go not quite to plan, my anxiety climbs in the drivers seat and runs me into a ditch where I lie there unable to comprehend a solution… even though there are literally hundreds of them calling to me from the edge of the ditch.

Getting a dog was one of those impulsive things where for some reason my anxiety and the more common sense side of my brain remained on sleep mode until the dog came into the picture. Then I could see the problem clearly, but before I go into that, I should really start from the beginning.

In my planner brain, my husband and I agreed on early in our marriage that despite us both loving animals. We were not getting a dog until we were moved into a house. Our first apartment did not allow any kind of pets, and both of us were working full time. We didn’t even have time to think about a dog.

Life changes though.

We moved to a pet friendly apartment, but I was still at Walmart working eight hour shifts. I remained firm in my position that we were not going to get a dog. Josh talked about getting a lizard for a little bit. A lizard, however, did not require nearly as much attention and work as a dog. A cat would be nice, but I did not like the idea of a litter box. I was slightly allergic to cats and dogs anyways so it would be an absolutely terrible idea for us to get any kind of furry critter in a two bedroom apartment.

I was getting bored and fed up with the retail world though, and it was not long after we moved into our new apartment that I put in my two week notice without a job lined up. (Another impulsive quest for the win!) I knew the basic idea of what kind of job I wanted. At least two people had mentioned the idea of working with animals to me. I had never thought about it before, but I loved animals so I started calling all of the dog boarding and/or grooming places in the area. I knew that with the labor shortage that at least one should be hiring.

By God’s grace, I did find a job at a dog boarding and grooming business. (Yes, I did this despite being slightly allergic to animals. My love for animals is stronger than my allergies.) In the interview, they told me something that my random brain should not have heard… if I took the job, I could bring my dog/dogs to work with me. My future doggo could come and be my work buddy.

I kept telling myself after that however that we just couldn’t afford it. I had looked at the pet amendment for our apartment when we first moved in and was convinced that it was far too expensive for a couple where one of the partners was now working a part time job.

That’s when I made a mistake… I started looking at puppies and dogs on petfinder.com, gooddog.com, and different social media rehoming groups. The planner side of my brain starting churning out a plan. I would save up enough money to buy the very specific kind of breed that I wanted. It would take quite a while to save up for one since the breed I wanted was usually well above $1,500 in a lot of cases. The dog breed was called Samoyed.

Samoyed, known for herding reindeer in Siberia

I had started putting money away and things were going smoothly. I knew my goal, and I was going to stick to it… that is until something came across my screen that I really couldn’t resist…

How the Bible Reading Challenged Changed My Daily Devotions

I was raised in a very solid Christian home. I saw my mom reading her Bible very often in the morning. My dad was a pastor and would talk about what he was studying in Bible very often in casual conversation (still does). When I reached my early teens, I acquired an interest in learning all things theology and about the Bible. I would say though that my daily Bible reading, however, was a huge struggle for me.

The constant pattern would go something like this: I would resolve to do better in my Bible reading. I would read a chapter a day for about a week, maybe a month, and then something would throw the whole pattern off. Suddenly three months of not reading my Bible later, in would set the guilt. Where did I go wrong and why couldn’t I get myself motivated to jump back in?

I would try to justify my guilt by saying that I just wasn’t being legalistic in my Bible reading. Legalism was also the excuse I used to avoid any Bible reading plans. Every youth group leader or Bible study leader would say: “now don’t just read your Bible to get that check mark on your list.” Honestly, I wish that I had never heard anyone ever say that. I did not need any extra ideas for justifying my laziness in daily devotions.

As a quick note, I am not saying that the youth group leader or Bible study leader is wrong and that there is no danger of pride setting in because “you checked all the days in your Bible reading plan.” Pride is a whole other subject, and I do not think that there should be any pride in taking the time to feed your soul. What I am arguing is that I think the problem of just getting people into the Word is the more widespread issue than Christians sticking their noses in the clouds because they read their Bible more than their brother in Christ. Again, note: if you are that Christian with their nose in the sky, come off your high horse and help some brothers out who are struggling.

Anyways, I had avoided Bible reading plans for a long time since they had the connotation of being legalistic in my mind. I still had the guilt of not being in the word regularly. Two things happened that turned this around for me.

First, when I was in Bible college, they set me up with a mentor who lived very close to the school. She was a dear young mom who helped me out majorly during that overwhelming time of my life. She told me about how she listened to the Bible being read to her via her phone. Now for most of you that might not be a revolutionary idea at all. For me though, this was huge. I had never ever thought to do that before. I had the Bible App on my phone which I used very randomly and usually for verse memorization when I realized that finals were coming up. The whole idea of the Bible being read to me really left me with no easy excuse to not be in the Word because I listen to music and podcasts almost non-stop in my everyday life. (My husband and family members can attest to the truthfulness of this statement.)

The second thing was when my mom asked me to join the “Same Page Summer” Bible Reading Challenge last year. Between my mom asking me to do it, and the Bible Reading Challenge being created by one of my favorite women authors, Rachel Jankovic, I couldn’t really say no. I started the reading plan, and I joined the “Bible Reading Challenge” Facebook group. I watched some of Rachel’s videos, and it completely changed how I looked at reading the Bible. The way she talked about coming the Bible like a meal and how when you miss a meal, you don’t eat extra to make up for it, helped me massively in dealing with my guilt for missing a day. I did not have to drag this massive weight of being a terrible Christian because I forgot a day or two. The important thing was to repent and then get right back into the Word.

A year later, I am still doing their Bible Reading challenge. I am currently doing their Same Page Summer Challenge which I highly encourage you to jump in if you aren’t already doing another Bible reading challenge. You can find the challenge here. I have to say that the guilt I always carried when I came to the Word is finally gone, and I am constantly noticing little details that I never noticed in the Scriptures. Maybe I just forgot them. Either way, it has been refreshing for my soul. I know I don’t do it perfectly, and I do miss days especially when my schedule gets wack. But, I have to say that this past year has been one of the most consistent years that I have spent in the Word for personal devotions.

Book Review: Irreversible Damage

Conservative Christians prophesied after the Obergefell decision transgenderism and polygamy would be next. As if on que, Bruce Jenner came out as “Caitlyn” Jenner and put transgender rights and activists in the spotlight. What I do not believe anyone predicted was the surge in gender dysphoria in teenage girls.

Abigail Schier investigated the issue of sudden onset gender dysphoria specifically in teenage girls. She takes an in depth look into the girls, their parents, and the schools. She does not hesitate getting into the nitty gritty details about the negative effects of being on testosterone long term and of some of the regrets from top surgery.

Even though Abigail is speaking up about the devastating effects of transition, you do not get the feeling that she hates these girls who are transitioning. Throughout her book she makes the point that she is trying to warn girls and parents. She advocates for there to be more barriers and hoops to jump through for minors before they can access gender reassignment surgery and testosterone (in some states without parental consent at the age of fifteen, mind you). She is not opposed to adult transition after a long therapeutic process.

That being said, I hope that you can tell that she is not coming from a Christian worldview. If she had been coming from a Christian worldview, I think that it would have been even better, but that is why authors like Nancy Pearcey and her book, “Love Thy Body” exist. Despite Schrier not coming from a Christian worldview, her book is still profoundly insightful in how these seemingly normal teenage girls almost overnight seem to come out of the closet proclaiming that they are boys.

One of these insights that helped me understand how girls would get sucked into was the effects of testosterone. The main positive effect of testosterone (parents pay attention carefully to this because the YouTube stars are selling testosterone to your daughters with this point) is that it helps the anxiety go away. As someone who personally struggles with anxiety, if you had told me that there was this magical hormone without telling me any of the side effects, I would be tempted to jump on board with it. Anxiety is a growing problem among teenagers in the digital age of social media.

Social media is a major part of the transgender trend. Anxiety is a symptom that I think most people can attest to after spending hours on social media. For girls, social media can be a complete nightmare. Photoshopped pictures of beauty standards that they can never achieve fill their Instagram feeds. These beauty standards and images of women that girls see in porn make them think that they are not feminine enough to be a woman. Honestly, it is hard not to blame them. Insecurity is almost guaranteed after spending anytime scrolling through TikTok and Instagram seeing other women my age who have seemingly perfect bodies and perfect makeup.

The last aspect that I wanted to cover was her research into the schools. If you have already spent sometime in conservative media and specifically on the trans issue, you have likely heard of the stories where children can request that their teachers and classmates call them by their new name and new pronouns.

I could cover many more aspects of the book, but these were some of the vital points and insights. I highly recommend that every parent read this book and anyone of college age.

Continue reading Book Review: Irreversible Damage

The Inevitability of Death

Note: Ha! I found the article I that I lost several times and wrote again for the fourth or fifth time.

Over the Covid season, I have been pondering about what our ancestors might have thought about us hiding in our houses and closing down businesses. I thought about reading Laura Ingles-Wilder books and about how Mary lost her sight from a fever. I thought about how that family nearly perished in the Dakotas when a harsh winter came through their town. I thought about Charles Dicken’s novels where they talked about children in child labor or in the case of “Nicholas Nickleby” of boys being dropped off at a boarding school where they would be starved and beaten. (This was based on true events and actually caused many parents to pull their boys out of the school.) I thought about the Pilgrims and about how many people died in just that first year alone.

The reason why I bring up our ancestors is because I want you to put a perspective on this past mad, mad year, 2020. Honestly, I concur that 2020 has been pretty awful as far as all of the drama in the White House, Covid-19 restrictions in the US, and the insane riots.

I want to clarify quickly that this is not to dismiss everyone’s troubles. I know that a lot of people do not have an easy life and have suffered many trials, but I also know that we have never been in a time of such wealth and prosperity as now mostly because of all of our technological advances. What I am trying to say is that people had the same problems as today… and more.

But… think back to Russia during the Cold War under the Soviet Union. People were getting dragged out of their homes in the middle of the night to a remote building where they were shot in the back of the head. What was their crime? They whispered something against the Soviets. If you push back further to 1900, according to the CDC up to 30% of infants did not live past a year. To put that in perspective, the mortality rate among infants in the U.S. now is 24 out of 100,000. To put it into a percentage, it would be about 0.024% percent of children die before the age of four.

To look at some other percentages, according to the Grunge, one out of three women would die in childbirth during the Middle Ages. Now, in the U.S. the mortality rate during childbirth is 17 women for every 100,000 women.

The reason why I bring all of this data up is because I want people to understand how life has changed through the course of human history. Our ancestors did not have an easy life. The goal of many people was to just survive unless you happened to be one of the ten percent of population who was born into royalty.

Today, we are a society numbed to our own prosperity, possibly due in part that most of us do not know our history well.

Now look at today and the current reaction to the illness casually referred to as “The Rona,” an illness where only 6% percentage of people who die while they have the illness had absolutely no underlying conditions. An illness which has been compared to a bad case of the flu. The flu which kills anywhere between 3,000 to an alarming 49,000 people every year.

The reason why I am greatly disappointed in the “Rona” is simply this: I was expecting the Black Death, and I got a really bad case of the flu.

I am not trying to dismiss the fact that people have died with the corona as the cherry on top to all of their other medical issues and that some people have genuinely had a terrible case of the corona and perished. As someone who believes in the value and dignity of every man being created in the image of God. I do think that those lives should be mourned… but one of the ugly truths about life that I personally have had to learn is that death is just a part of life.

I know I sound like that I completely contradicted myself, but hear me out. At what cost have we gone into lock down, masked up, and told everyone to stay away from each other? Especially among the poorer classes of people, depression and suicide are expected to rise. I think about the tens of thousands of small businesses that will never reopen in the future. Do you think that you can take away jobs and lively hoods away from people and that will not have the same effect?

The Black Plague

Now, if the Rona was the Black Plague, I would too be hiding under my table wearing two masks and spraying every person who got within two feet of me with sanitizer. Here’s the thing though, from what I have observed, I don’t know maybe it is different where you are at, but I am not seeing bodies laying in the street. I am not seeing entire families and towns vanishing because of the corona. What I am seeing, is people going into the hospital or staying at home with a wretched case of the flu… and then I see them at work two weeks later doing just fine.

I compare these two because when this observation struck me. The terror of the corona weaned. I wish that my terror had weaned when I realized that this could just be my ticket to see my Lord and Savior face to face, but more on that later. People have been hiding in isolation since the beginning of March because they are so terrified. It makes me so sad, not only because I deeply want to see these people, but because as an anxious person, I completely understand the burden that fear is.

Here is the ugly reality. You are going to get sick. It might not be the corona, it could be the flu. It could be cancer. You might be one of those unfortunate souls who actually contracts the Black Death (yes, it is still around, if you follow Drudge Report, he usually has a story about that). We cannot hide from life forever. You might say that you are waiting for a vaccine. Fauci actually says that you should maintain your precautions even with a vaccine. (I am not joking). We will probably be told that we should continue to hide in our houses. Terrible news. 30,000 Americans die at home from unintentional injuries.

All of humanity are on a march towards death. We can thank Adam and Eve for that one.

“By the sweat of your face you shall eat bread, till you return to the ground, for out of it you were taken; for you are dust, and to the dust you shall return.” Genesis 3:19, ESV

My speculation, and that is really all it is, is that because we have become such a secular culture who has bought the lie from Satan that there is no afterlife that we have reacted in a way to always be safe. There is no doubt in my mind that America is a safety obsessed culture. We all know the stories about helicopter parents, and the new rise of the lawnmower parents. The helicopter parents will watch and ask about their child’s every move, but the lawnmower parents will clear a pathway for their children so that their child never encounters adversity. I think that we all know a lawnmower or helicopter parent so I will not go into more detail.

You can be the safest person on the planet, and guess what, you will still die. Why? Because God said that you would. You could die in a car accident on your way to get your groceries. You could die by falling down your steps. You could contract the Corona and be one of the few people who actually dies of it. There are millions and millions of ways that you could die. Ultimately, we go when our time is up.

For obvious reasons, do not go and drive off of a cliff in complete disregard for safety saying, “whelp, when God says I need to go, I’ll go.” Be wise. Do not go testing God that way, and do not walk around in a hazmat suit everywhere you go. Understand that civilizations and technological advances weren’t made by people who cowered in terror, but people who were willing to take risks.

Now for the reason why you, Christian, should not be absolutely terrified of death. I think that you already know the answer. If you are convinced that Jesus Christ paid the full penalty of your sins and that you will stand justified before God on Judgment Day, then you can rest assured that you will enter a rest that will be so much sweeter than the best that this world has to offer.

“Behold, the tabernacle of God is among men, and He will dwell among them, and they shall be His people, and God Himself will be among them, and He will wipe away every tear from their eyes; and there will no longer be any death; there will no longer be any mourning, or crying, or pain; the first things have passed away.” Rev. 21:3–4, NASB

To Live is Christ and to Die is Gain

I cannot guarantee you that your death will be painless. I cannot guarantee you that if you leave your house that you will not get the corona. The one thing that I can guarantee you that if you are truly a Christian, that you can hold to this truth: Being with Christ will be more wonderful than anything this world has to offer. Go and encourage other Christians and remind them of this truth. Reach out to the unbeliever who is petrified of death. Show courage in the face of this panic. Be a light in this strange, dark time. Christ already defeated death for us.

“O death, where is your victory? O death, where is your sting?” The sting of death is sin, and the power of sin is the law. But thanks be to God, who gives us the victory through our Lord Jesus Christ. Therefore , my beloved brother, be steadfast, immovable, always abounding in the word of the Lord, knowing that in the Lord your labor is not in vain. 1 Cor. 15:55–58 ESV

“Ride, Sally, Ride”: A Book Review on Doug Wilson’s Latest Book

When I was younger, I used to read a whole book in a day. Occasionally I would read multiple Nancy Drew and Boxcar Children. Yes, I would like to claim my bored homeschooler card. Then as a teenager those books turned into The Inheritance Cycle and Ms. Peregrine’s Home for Peculiar Children. My introduction to those series, however, was several years ago, and since college, I have not found a novel or series which I sat down and read quickly because I enjoyed it. Bethlehem College kept me reading books in a day, but I cannot honestly say that I enjoyed all of what we read. I was in a drought of having any good novels to read, until I picked up, Ride, Sally, Ride.

Pastor and author Doug Wilson is one of my favorite bloggers, and when I first heard the ad for the novel, I was intrigued. Doug has a unique style of writing which I have mainly appreciated through his blog and his book Confessions of a Food Catholic. To say the least, Ride, Sally, Ride did not disappoint.

The whole story is set about twenty years into the future in a very divided United States, in what I might add is a somewhat optimistic perspective of the future. The main character, Ace, has destroyed his neighbor’s wife, a sexbot, and is now on trial for murder. The whole story centers around this court case of proving that Ace is guilty of murder rather than destruction of property. His trial gets wrapped up into the overall larger battle happening between the red and blue states.

The first thing that I really appreciated was several scenes discussing proper sexuality and how humanity, particularly women, are benefited by it. Granted, being that it is a book about the destruction of a sexbot, one might expect that.

Another thing that I really appreciated was the portrayal of the character, Benson, Ace’s father, an oversensitive evangelist. He has a heart for the unsaved, however, his theology is rather weak. His method tends to be to just love people and to never do anything to offend them. Unfortunately, I would say that Benson is a great representation of many evangelical pastors today.

The last thing I want to say about this novel is that it is not unbearably corny. Unfortunately, within Christianity there is a tendency to create very bad quality movies and books. This bad reputation has caused me to tend to shy away from most novel’s that are hailed as “Christian.” Ride, Sally, Ride, however, did not bear the usual source of cringe that I have seen in other Christian novels. Doug’s book has given me some hope for the Christian novel hemisphere, and I hope that more Christian novelists like him appear.

So overall, I would highly recommend this novel. It has been a long time since I enjoyed a novel so much. In all honesty, if the future does turn out the way it does in Doug’s novel, I would be content with that.

Book Review: “You’re Not Enough (and that’s okay)”

If you have spent anytime reading quotes on Instagram, Pinterest, or Facebook. You have inevitably come across quotes that go something like this: “You owe yourself the love that you so freely give to other people.” Maybe you or someone you know has posted about their self-care day/week. You have probably run into those quotes or long posts about you being perfect even with all of your personality “flaws.” On the surface, these seem harmless and legitimately good. After all it makes sense right, how can you love someone else if you do not have any love for yourself? Everyone needs a day off to do something fun after working hard in order to recharge. Everyone has flaws of some sort, so what is the big deal?

In “You’re Not Enough (And That’s Okay)”, Allie Stuckey addresses the issues behind the ideology of self-love. She points people away from the lies that are constantly being shoved in women’s faces that we are enough and that we are perfect just the way we are. As the book title says, Allie argues that we are not enough and that we are not perfect just the way we are. The reason that this is okay is because we were made to rely and lean on Christ.

Allie tackles 5 Myths that the culture of self-love that women have been told: “You Are Enough,” “You Determine Your Truth,” “You’re Perfect the Way You Are,” “You’re Entitled to Your Dreams,” and “You Can’t Love Others Until You Love Yourself.” As she tackles each one of these myths, she describes how believing these myths affected her own life and how she overcame them by learning to lean on and focus on Christ instead of herself. She shows how the lies of self-love affect even the most basic parts of human life, and how God’s design is better for us.

I would highly recommend this book to every woman who has social media. Even if you have not bought the entirety of the lie that self-love is the cure for all of your problems, you likely have bought some part of the lie in an aspect of your life that you had never suspected. Allie’s exhortation is refreshing and encouraging in a world where women are constantly told that the solution to all of their problems is to love themselves more. The truth is that self is a miserable god to serve and will always leave us worse off than when we started. Jesus is the better god to serve. He took the punishment that we sinners deserved and offers salvation from our sin if we repent and believe in his death and resurrection.

Short Update and an Endorsement for Bible College

I am back!

I thought that I would have the time to write while I was in school, but I was wrong. Anytime I was able to write or had incentive to write was converted into energy to be used for one of the many papers required for school. Then as soon as the school year was over, I was thrown into wedding planning mode and for some reason my workaholic self thought that working full-time until a few days before my wedding was a good idea. Life seems to just stay very busy to say the least, but I digress.

I have to say that my freshman year of college was quite the adventure and learning experience. I am not just talking about the academic sphere although I would say that was the biggest category. Four specific lessons stood out to me when thinking about what I learned over the past school year. 

Lesson One: Humility. I have to ashamedly admit that I am a very proud creature when it comes to my knowledge on the Bible and theological issues. Bible College was a nice kick in my rear end in that regard. My favorite saying in the first few weeks of college was, “I am learning how much I do not know.” Our freshman year started with Genesis and ended in Revelation. For the first two weeks, our class wrestled through the controversies surrounding the Creation account, and from there we worked our way through the long historical accounts and the confusing prophetic books. I knew nothing about interpreting prophetic books, and I would say by no means that one semester in college makes me capable of understanding the wheels within wheels covered in eyes  in Ezekiel. However, it did give me some of the tools necessary for understanding the poetry and imagery in Hosea and how it applies to Christians today.

Lesson Two: Exegesis is extremely difficult. I had several papers where exegesis was required. Some were definitely harder than others. The kingdom of God was an easier paper to write rather than my paper on biblical manhood and womanhood from 1 Timothy 2:8–15. If you do not know that passage, look it up and just try to figure out verse fifteen specifically. Exegesis sounds easy at face value. Just read the Bible and whatever it says it clearly means that… right? Well, that’s mostly true. Immediate context is key and helpful, but one also has to pay attention to the context of how the passage relates to the Bible as a whole. It sometimes makes exegesis easier, but it can also make things much more difficult. For example, James saying that faith without works is dead is completely uncontroversial until you look at what the Apostle Paul has to say about faith in relation to works. It takes time to sit down and carefully read in order to understand the context that they were both writing in and what problems that they were addressing in order to understand how they do not contradict each other. Context is not the only influencer. The genre of the books in the Bible is another factor. Psalms and 1 Samuel require different approaches because Psalms is poetry and 1 Samuel is a historical book. I say all of this to show that more goes into exegesis than one might think. This should not intimidate the lay person from trying to interpret Scripture, but rather encourage those who might struggle to understand certain passages in Scripture.

Lesson Three: If you can learn to read well, you can educate yourself well. Reading is very much underrated in our digital world. We are all told to read more, but the problem is that we are not taught how to read well and with a critical mind. By critical, I do not mean that you are nit picking, rather I mean that you are thinking through the author’s arguments taking what is good and thinking through why they might be wrong rather than just taking it in. It seemed that before I read without much of a filter.

One of my dear professors had us read some of a book called, How to Read a Book, which introduced us to several new principles. Regretfully, I do not always apply all of them, but they opened my eyes to how badly I had been reading. One of the very first things the author encouraged his readers to do was to write in the books that we were reading. This opened up a whole new realm for me. One of the first controversial topics we took on in the first semester was Creation. We read a book called 40 Questions about Creation & Evolution. Being someone who grew up reading much of Ken Ham’s material, I had all of my young earth creationist arguments ready to blow. I covered the edges of the pages with notes arguing against the various points of view. This engaging in a conversation with the author helped me think through why I thought the author was wrong instead of flossing over the pages going, “that’s wrong.”

Lesson Four, it is good for Christians of other denominations to talk and unite together on issues… but it is also good for them to attend different churches. Many denominations are orthodox and are able to get along well, but the existence of different denominations is good for the body of Christ. I had a diverse class when it came to different denominations. We had Pentecostals, Reformed, Baptists, Church of Nazarene, and Presbyterians. We had people on the cessationist side of the spectrum and the continuationist side. We had Old Earth Creationists and Young Earth Creationists. However, we were all united in the blood of Christ. We could all stand together in defense of justification by faith and faith alone. We did not call each other’s faith into question even though we were extremely convinced in our convictions. We would debate the issues and lay out our best cards, but at the end of the day, we could unite as brothers in the faith and worship the Lord our God.

I write all of this partially to be an endorsement for going to Bible college, but not just any old Bible college. A good Bible college that will give you good exegetical tools, have a critical mind, and surround you in a community of believers who truly love God and love Jesus. You do not have to go to Bethlehem College & Seminary specifically (although I would highly recommend it). Nor do you have to stay and finish up your degree at Bible college, but a year or just a semester at Bible college can help solidify the foundation of one’s faith and equip you with tools on how to approach the Bible which you can use for the rest of your life.

I hope to be writing more and mostly focusing on reviewing books since I am trying to get back into reading. Working full time keeps me very busy, but writing is my passion, and I would love to stick with it.

Why You Can’t Just Stop Worrying

“Stop thinking about it.”

“Just stop worrying about it.”

“Relax, it’s going to be okay.”

And the examples could go on and on. All of these sentences come from well intentioned people. I myself have used these phrases in trying to comfort someone. If you’re someone prone to anxiety, you know full well that you can’t “just stop worrying about it”. The solution is much deeper than that and has to do with your heart.

You Can’t Just Forget About It

Anxiety crawls into your mind and constantly pesters you. If you have a big job interview coming up and your lifestyle is dependent on it, you’re going to worry about it. It doesn’t matter if you go somewhere and do something fun to try to drown out your thoughts, you’re still going to be thinking about the interview. You may be smiling and having fun, but internally you’re tearing your hair out.

Maybe it’s not something as big as an interview. Maybe it’s just trying to finish all your homework on time. Maybe all of your in-laws are coming over, and the house is in complete disarray, and you’re already busy preparing meals. Whatever it is. You know that you can’t just shove it aside and not think about it. You will try your very best to distract yourself. Either it will succeed for the time being or it might not distract you at all.

Stop Trying to Forget It

Trying to forget a problem has never solved it. You can’t just forget whatever is causing you anxiety. You need to stop and think about why the thing is causing you stress. Then once you’ve worked out that, you need to ask yourself if there is anything you can do to help relieve that anxiety. For example: if you’re really stressed out because your list of things to do keeps growing, then get up and do some of the things. It will help aleve your anxiety.

Sometimes, however, we are anxious over something we have no control over. My family has a history of cancer, will I contract cancer? How am I going to pay for my bills? Will all my children become apostate? Will I ever find a spouse?

It’s questions like this that fester down in our hearts constantly. We can’t control what the outcome of them are. So what can we do?

Bad Things Happen

First thing is to acknowledge is that bad things happen. No matter how many times people tell you “it’s going to be okay”, it’s not always going to be okay every time which is why we worry.

God is a good God, but those of us who have been a Christian for awhile would be lying to say that He doesn’t ever let the worst happen. You may get cancer. You may not be able to pay your bills. All your kids may become apostate. You might be single the rest of your life.

Worse yet, even Jesus doesn’t promise you that he will give you an automatically good life in fact he promises the opposite.

“Remember the word that I said to you, ‘A slave is not greater than his master.’ If they persecuted Me, they will also persecute you; if they kept My word, they will keep yours also.”
‭‭JOHN‬ ‭15:20‬ ‭NASB‬‬
“Do you suppose that I came to grant peace on earth? I tell you, no, but rather division; for from now on five members in one household will be divided, three against two and two against three.”
‭‭LUKE‬ ‭12:51-52‬ ‭NASB‬‬

A Loving Father

So what do we do then? How can we ever rest easy? How can we stop worrying knowing that bad things will happen?

These questions bring us to our second point we must acknowledge. God is a good God who loves us. He is in complete control of everything. He knows what is best for us and allows the bad things to happen for our good.

“And we know that God causes all things to work together for good to those who love God, to those who are called according to His purpose.”
‭ROMANS‬ ‭8:28‬ NASB
“Consider it all joy, my brethren, when you encounter various trials, knowing that the testing of your faith produces endurance. And let endurance have its perfect result, so that you may be perfect and complete, lacking in nothing.”
‭‭JAMES‬ ‭1:2-4‬ ‭NASB
“Blessed is a man who perseveres under trial; for once he has been approved, he will receive the crown of life which the Lord has promised to those who love Him.”
‭‭JAMES‬ ‭1:12‬ ‭NASB‬‬

God is our loving father. He loves us to the point where he sacrificed his son to save us from our sins. He will take care of us during the hard times and the good times. So we must trust God that even when the scary things happen that He will take care of us.

The Battle

Thirdly and finally, we trust God not that He won’t let the big scary things happen, but that He is bigger than the problem and that He will help you through whatever the big thing is. Jesus himself said to take one day at a time. Sometimes it’s all you can do.

“”For this reason I say to you, do not be worried about your life, as to what you will eat or what you will drink; nor for your body, as to what you will put on. Is not life more than food, and the body more than clothing? Look at the birds of the air, that they do not sow, nor reap nor gather into barns, and yet your heavenly Father feeds them. Are you not worth much more than they? And who of you by being worried can add a single hour to his life?
“So do not worry about tomorrow; for tomorrow will care for itself. Each day has enough trouble of its own.”
‭‭MATTHEW‬ ‭6:25-27, 34‬ ‭NASB‬‬

It’s not as simple as just “stop worrying about it”. It’s much deeper than that. It’s looking up to God and casting your anxiety on Him like: “I don’t know what’s going to happen. This scary thing is coming. You are in full control of the universe, and nothing can happen without You knowing. You will be by my side whether the best or worst case scenario happens.”

Anxiety has had me wrapped around its finger for as long as I can remember. It’s an ongoing battle and will continue to be. It’s not a quick easy fix. It takes time, energy, the power of the Holy Spirit, and faith. Seek encouragement and help from other believers. Spend time in God’s word and meditate on His promises knowing He’s a good God who loves you.

Making the Scary Decisions

Whether you’re a senior in high school or high school graduate, the most commonly asked and terrifying question you will get asked is: “what are your plans now that you’re done?” It’s a well intentioned and great small talk question; question for which you probably have a rehearsed answer. This doesn’t just apply for going into school. This applies for other big life decisions like who to date, changing jobs, moving, etc. Often times you are wondering: “well what does God want me to do? I know He has a plan for my life, but I don’t know what His plan is.” In this tiny article, we are going to talk about how you can actually find out what God’s will is for your life. I’m fairly certain you’re not going to like it.

“Then Gideon said to God, “If You will deliver Israel through me, as You have spoken, behold, I will put a fleece of wool on the threshing floor. If there is dew on the fleece only, and it is dry on all the ground, then I will know that You will deliver Israel through me, as You have spoken.””
‭‭JUDGES‬ ‭6:36-37‬ ‭NASB‬‬

Many Christians think to seek God’s will like Gideon did with the fleece . I don’t think that’s how we are supposed to find God’s will. Might I say that it’s much simpler than that. As a person who stresses out about simple planning decisions, I read and listened to pastors* who are much wiser than me talk about this issue. What I have found freeing and learned from them came down to these three things.

Is the Decision Sinful?

Susie wants to get married beyond all reason. She’s never had a boyfriend, and she’s about to turn thirty. She found this good guy, Johnathan. So far they are just friends, it doesn’t take long for her to discover that he isn’t a Christian. When he asks her to be his girlfriend, she’s confronted with the decision to date him. She knows that a Christian is commanded to not become unequally yoked, (‭‭2 CORINTHIANS‬ ‭6:14) but Johnathan might be the only man who ever takes interest in her.

Singleness isn’t easy, but being unequally yoked is worse. She turns him down choosing to obey God’s Word.

Hard decisions come up in life like this all of the time. If one of the choices is sinful or maybe just outright stupid, and you know it is, then you know that that isn’t God’s will for you. God would never want you to do something sinful or just stupid.

Pray and Consult Other Believers

Xander isn’t sure for what profession he should go. He just graduated high school, and he has different interests that he would love to pursue: nuclear engineering, carpenter, or pastorate. He is frustrated knowing that these are very different fields. He prays for wisdom and asks people who have known him for a long time and care deeply about his best interests. Many people encourage him towards engineering knowing how he is extremely good with math and enjoys doing it. They know he has the smarts to be a pastor, but he lacks the people skills. As for carpentry, he just doesn’t do well with all of the physical labor.

Always pray for wisdom from God, He will help you in choosing. He likely won’t tell you with a booming voice from the heavens, but He may tell you through the people around you. After you’ve prayed about it, keep praying and ask people who know you well and care about your well being. We all have the friend we ask for advice because we know that they will tell you what you want to hear. Don’t go to them. Go to the older generation in your church. Go to your friends who have known you a long time. Go to your family members if you have good relationships with them.

Do you want to do it? Then do it.

James wants to go into the mission field. He knows that that’s all he wants to do with his life. He’s prayed about it tirelessly, and everyone around him encourages him to it. He could go to law school at Harvard. He has the smarts and a scholarship, but he wants to go into the mission field. He has the money to go to Finland and has been offered a pastoral position. He decides to go.

This might sound shocking, but if you’ve cleared the other two hedges with ease, then do what you want. I’m dead serious. Stop waiting for a sign, and go do what you want. If the decision isn’t sinful, you’ve prayed about it, your Christian brethren think it’s a good idea, and you want to do it then go for it. Make the decision. Do the thing. Marry the girl. Go into the profession. Change the job. Maybe don’t do any of it and continue doing whatever you’ve been doing. Just make a choice and stop being paralyzed by anxiety and indecisiveness.

*resources on this issue that I’ve found helpful are: ‘Just Do Something’ by Kevin DeYoung and John MacArthur: https://www.gty.org/library/sermons-library/TMU105/knowing–gods-will

The Murky Middle

You know when you’ve hit a writing roll. You just can’t stop writing. You’re so excited about how the story is going. You’re up till two in the morning, and the computer keys are hot. You know you should go to sleep, but you just can’t pull yourself away. You’re immersed in your imaginary world having so much fun.

Then somewhere in the next few days, you can barely bring yourself to the computer to continue writing. You just have no energy for writing. You’d rather be doing literally anything else. It’s not that you have writer’s block. You know where you want this story to go, but you don’t want to put the effort into getting there.

What happened?

I love a good writing roll. It makes my heart happy when I can write a whole short story in a month without having to tell myself to write.

We writers know that isn’t the norm though as much as we wish it was.

For me, this usually happens during the middle of a story. I’m just bored with the idea. I shove it aside and will probably never go back to it. If I do, I will try to restart the entire thing.

Sometimes I just get distracted with other creative activities. I will have the desire to do nothing else but knit hats for the next three months. Once I get bored of that, I either go to a different creative thing or back to writing.

The one of the solutions I’ve found is if I genuinely think I’ve got a good story in mind. I’ll make myself work through the murky middle once I’m back on my writing roll. If I don’t think it’s a good story when I come back to it or just really don’t care, it goes into the ever growing pile of unfinished novels.

Sometimes I ruin my writing roll by thinking I don’t need a plot for my story and that I can just figure it out as I go.

Bad plan.

I have learned the hard way that my stories will end up stranger than “Alice in Wonderland” if I don’t have some idea of where I want to take the story. I will tie my characters in tangled knots and have no clue how to get them out. Now my entire story looks like “The Wonderful Wizard of Oz” on steroids.

Another thing which somewhat helps me get through is having someone reading your story who is interested in it. They are interested in it. It gives me more confidence and motivation to continue with the story. It doesn’t always work, but a majority of the time it does.

Maybe the solution for me is to only write short stories with simple plots. That way I don’t have to constantly go back and triple check for contradictions which will save me some work in the next draft.

If you have solutions for keeping the writing roll going, please leave them in comments below. I would love to hear them!